Chloe

Most people go to the golf course and bring back stories of a birdie or, on a lucky day, an eagle. I'm a little different... About a month ago, I came back from the golf course with a puppy.

I was on the driving range and my glove was coming apart. The loose threads inside the glove felt weird and I wasn't striking the ball as usual. So I sat down at a nearby bench and started tearing my glove apart and when I looked up there was a little puppy sitting right next to me. She scared the shit out of me at first because I spotted her with my peripheral vision but once I saw her wagging tail I calmed down a bit.

There's a house right across the road from the club house that houses about 20 dogs. It's annoying as hell sometimes on the driving range because a loud chopper will go by and all 20 dogs go ape shit. I figured she came from that house so I took her and knocked on the door but no one seemed to be home. If she was an ugly dog, I think I would have left her on the golf course but she seemed hungry and dehydrated and her puppy eyes pleaded not to leave her by herself so I decided to take her home for the night and take her to the animal shelter the following day.

When I got home, Michelle fell in love with the dog instantly. We were talking about getting Brownie a playmate anyways and instead of purchasing another pure breed with tons of health problems from the constant Arkansas/West Virginia tradition of cousin-fucking, we figured this would be a cheaper option. Of course when we took her to the vet we found that she was infested with fleas and worms but nothing a couple of shots and pills couldn't fix.

It's potty training all over again for us but it's getting better with time. Chloe is a hell of a lot smarter than Brownie and she already knows how to sit, stay, and shake hands on command. We're expecting her to be about 60 lbs when she's fully grown and that should add a nice little feature to the home security system. Some people pay a monthly fee for home security systems. Any burglar is welcome into my house as long as they're prepared to deal with a 60 pound dog and a possible 30-06 round from a high powered deer rifle. That's right...I'm redneck...Korean by birth, Southern by the grace of God.